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There is a squeaky old merry-go-round in my neighborhood that my own children play on from time to time. Years of kids riding on it have loosened its joints so it spins more freely and quickly. The last time they played on the merry-go-round, my children learned the important lesson that the closer to the center they sit the more stable and in control they feel.
While being a school leader has always felt like being on a spinning piece of playground equipment, leading since the inauguration of President Donald Trump has made me feel as if I moved from the center to the edges in this merry-go-round metaphor. Immigration raids and attacks on civil liberties have made the work feel blindingly fast.
The school I serve has a large population of immigrant students. Teens who just weeks ago felt like our school was a safe and secure place now carry a new level of concern into our classrooms and hallways. My school has seen a significant drop in attendance since January with parents and guardians citing the desire to keep their children home instead of sending them to school and putting them in harm’s way as ICE raids happen across the city.
Our staff feels the impact of the rhetoric and policy shifts out of Washington as well. They fear for the physical and emotional safety of our students when they leave the school.
For my part, I wonder if my decisions that prioritize equity and inclusion will make me the target of criticism–or worse, an investigation. This year, we have had ongoing professional development opportunities to teach staff how they can better support our queer students and employees. Each time we engage in these discussions, I find myself worrying about the repercussions.
But I am determined that the programs and people in place to support and protect our most vulnerable students will not go away. Rather, they will be reinforced. My role as a school leader is to create an environment so safe and accepting that students and staff never feel like they must look over their shoulder while they are at school. We want them to breathe easily knowing that, at least during the school day, they can be seen, safe, and successful.
To be sure, this job has always been a juggle, which includes instructional leadership, behavioral support, budgeting, staffing, and–in my case–fighting the stigma of historically being identified as a low-performing school by the Colorado Department of Education. But the changes out of Washington have taken things to the next level. As I navigate it all, I do my best to be energetic, optimistic, and reliable. Each day is an exercise in finding joy in my interactions with students and staff.
I find joy in seeing students cheer on their peers at basketball games. I find joy in watching a teacher sit with a student until they grasp a challenging concept. I find joy when I see staff members step in to teach a class for a colleague who is sick or just needs a break. I find joy and hope in my daily interactions with students and staff; they are the core of my work and are the bravest people I have worked with in my career.
When I push my children on the merry-go-round, I tell them to get to the center because the spinning seems to slow down and the noise decreases. This is the same advice I would give to school leaders right now. Get right to the center of your work by being with students and staff as much as possible. Even at the center, the spinning does not stop. The raids, political attacks, and fear tactics do not decrease, but the challenge of facing them becomes a little more manageable. While every force out there may be pushing leaders away from the center of their work, prioritizing that values-based work reminds us exactly why we do what we do.
Chalkbeat is a nonprofit news site covering educational change in public schools.
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